Save yourself for marriage. We’ve all heard the abstinence arguments before. Through various organizations, churches, pastors, and married couples, the message of abstinence has been force feed and shoved in the faces of young Americans. The message is being presented, but what about other messages that need presentation but are lacking it. Marriage is presented in the church but how much on the subject is present to those not married.

Mark Regnerus has an article in Christianity Today entitled “The Case for Early Marriage” (http://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2009/august/16.22.html). Regnerus points out that “over 90 percent of American adults experience sexual intercourse before marrying. The percentage of evangelicals who do so is not much lower. In a nationally representative study of young adults, just under 80 percent of unmarried, church- going, conservative Protestants who are currently dating someone are having sex of some sort.” If his percentages are accurate, it shows that even in the realm of abstinence young church-goers aren’t doing very well. How after so many abstinence messages could the percentages be so high?

Regnerus states “I've come to the conclusion that Christians have made much ado about sex but are becoming slow and lax about marriage—that more significant, enduring witness to Christ's sacrificial love for his bride. Americans are taking flight from marriage. We are marrying later, if at all, and having fewer children.” This may be due to messages of higher divorce rates coming out of younger marrying individuals. Teen marriage may not be the wisest decision. However, according to Regnerus, marriages that take place for couples in their early 20s are not as risk prone.

Making a case for marriage and abstinence, Regnerus article calls for a balance in teaching. Marriage should be taught so that those considering young marriage understand it fully and Biblically. The last thing we want is to have people “marring early simply for the promise of long-awaited, guilt-free sex.”

I’m not sure I agree with everything Regnerus had to say. Do we really want to pressure couples who are struggling to wait for sex into marriages? He did however address that in his article and it seems he has the same concerns.

What are your thoughts should we be content with marrying later or should we push marrying younger? Will sending messages to marry younger really resolve issues on abstinence?

Growing up I would have never imagined that I would actually miss being in some form of school. I remember how badly I longed to be out of high school. My first two years of college I spent living at home going to a community college. It was a relief when I got my associates degree. I was ready for something better, but I had little idea how much that “better” would change my life. I choose my next college for its writing program, its community, and its Christian standing.

The past two years of my life have been some of the most enjoyable times I have ever had. I’ve created some of the best friendships I will ever have. I learned what I desired to know about my career path. Along the way, I was in classes focusing on Christianity. General education studies at my school included classes such as Biblical Literature 1+2, Contemporary Christian Belief, and Historic Christian Belief. At times, I felt like my beliefs were getting empty with having so much classroom time on topics of Christianity.

This past fall changed everything about my college and about how I experienced the love of God through my brothers and sisters in Christ. My college was a sister school. In the fall semester, our campus was called to gather together. As we sat around not knowing what was happening, we were given the news that our campus was closing in May. Disappointment, bitterness, and disbelief fell upon the student body as students had to again search for direction.

As the weeks went on after the announcement, I saw a great change in the student body. While the closing of our campus was affecting us, it also gave us as not only the body of the school but as the body of Christ to impact the community. Our college played a large role in the community by helping out in various ways and by having students do their practicum around the city. We were able to show the community the application of our faith during a challenging time.

By showing the community our consistent love for God and for others, we not only impacted the community but also impacted each other as well. It makes me slightly sad when I go to the store and se the large signs “Back to College” or “Dorm Items.” As a graduate, my college time is over for now, but I will always remember how God moved and used his people.

Have you ever had a unfortunate circumstance which enabled you to grow closer to God?